Healing

Regret is one of the hardest emotions we can feel. It can be a relief to realize that regret is a secondary emotion, and by addressing the primary feelings regret can be released. The primary emotion in this case is grief. Grief occurs when something is lost that cannot be regained. In the case of regret, what has … [Read more...]

One of the major tasks of healing is self-acceptance. While a lot can be gained by developing mindfulness and skillfulness, there is a fundamental peace and clarity that comes from accepting and meeting yourself where you are without judgment. We All Judge Ourselves We all struggle with feelings of inadequacy. We worry … [Read more...]

Those who grow up in an environment that is not safe (whether physically or emotionally) develop a heightened sense of threat. They learn to scan the environment for potential danger, and react defensively. As an adult, this can continue as a chronic sense of fear and a predisposition to overreact and take things … [Read more...]

To actively defuse a trigger (instead of just letting it wear itself out), you must stay aware during the process that you ARE triggered. You have to have a thread of awareness that stays with you throughout the triggered state, so you can give yourself directives on how to get calmed down again. Recognize what you feel … [Read more...]

We all have triggers: situations that bring up old feelings that are out of proportion to the current experience. There are two ways to deal with triggers--go into them more deeply, and let a "healing crisis" occur (a cathartic release of the pent-up feelings). This is an intense way to deal with it and can heal deep … [Read more...]

Affirmations get a bad rap. The phrase "putting lipstick on a pig" sums up the most frequent criticisms. I see affirmations as a tool—they can be used effectively, or not. I have used them and they've helped me to rewire certain thought patterns, so I want to share how I approach them. I believe that the key to a … [Read more...]